Finding Solace
by Crezhul
Summary: Some things never go as planned. A lingering memory threatens to ruin Todoroki's reunion with Midoriya. [TodoDeku Yaoi, Manga Spoilers]


**Finding Solace**

The evening light filtered through a crack in Shouto's curtain, casting a warm glow on the boy snuggled next to Shouto on the futon.

Reaching out a hand, Shouto swept his knuckles across Izuku's freckled cheeks, his other hand was pressed flat on Izuku's chest as if to confirm the heartbeat thrumming underneath his palm.

Izuku and other classmates had been whisked away on a covert operation involving the Yakuza and The Villain Alliance. Fortunately they all returned safe and uninjured but circumstances robbed Shouto of a proper reunion with his boyfriend. "Welcome back, Izuku."

Giving him a soft warm smile in turn, Izuku nuzzled Shouto's hand. "It's great to be back, Shouto."

And Shouto struggled to find the words to convey what Izuku being back meant to him, to no longer wonder where Izuku was or if Izuku was safe and for the days to stop crawling now that Izuku was here but instead Shouto said, "I missed you."

Rubbing his chest, Izuku replied in kind. "I missed you too."

After gazing into those green eyes that had seen more than Shouto could ever imagine, Shouto leaned forward and in one smooth movement covered Izuku's mouth with his own; he had missed this, holding Izuku close and spoiling him with kisses.

"So the mission was a success." Shouto asked after some time, fingers trailing a path along Izuku's arm.

Letting out a breath, Izuku furrowed his brows as if he was considering something. "Yeah...things got really intense, for a while it felt like nothing was going right but we made it somehow."

Blinking at the slight waver in Izuku's voice, Shouto felt the tension in his body lease out when Izuku did not cry but continued talking with a genuine smile on his face.

"I learnt a lot. This mission helped me to get closer to the kind of hero that I want to become in the future."

"Is that so?"

Izuku nodded. "Yup, just wait and you'll see!"

Curling his lips, Shouto admired Izuku's bright and positive outlook and no one could convince Shouto that Izuku was not destined to be anything less than Japan's next Symbol of Peace, as Izuku's selflessness, courage and pure heart were unlike any other. Izuku's words at the Sports Festival had lit more than just Shouto's left side afire."

"I look forward..." before Shouto could finish that sentence, a recent memory replayed in his mind.

Returning to reality with the need to forget what he had just remembered, Shouto found his boyfriend sitting up on the futon with a worried expression on his face.

"Did something happen when I left? Did you get hurt during training, I'm sorry for not asking about-"

Sitting up on the futon, Shouto caught both of Izuku's flailing hands and set them on his lap. Did Izuku not know that Izuku was the most selfless person to Shouto? "No, I needed to know how things went with you and...I just remembered something…"

Trailing off, Shouto wanted to maintain the pleasant mood with his boyfriend and not taint it by bringing up the one event that he had tried to shove to the back of his mind; he thought he could forget this but most memories involving Endeavour would resurface at the worst moments.

"You don't have to tell me if you don't want to of course but I'm here to listen, any time, you can text me if you're not up for saying it out loud, I'd even leave the room if that's what you need." Izuku flipped the positions of their hands, covering Shouto's hands with his crooked ones, reassuring him.

Looking away from Izuku, Shouto exhaled, letting out a trail of steam. It was pointless to deny Izuku who had the strange ability of coaxing the truth out of Shouto. "Endeavour showed up to the Provisional License training the day after you came back."

Izuku narrowed his eyes. "What did he do? Did he make a scene like last time?"

"He mostly watched me and talked with All Might."

"All Might was there too?" Izuku's voice leaked with worry.

And there was no doubt that Izuku was wondering if it were possible for the former number one hero and current number one hero to safely share the same space, so Shouto explained that All Might substituted for Aizawa-sensei, then Shouto described the training exercise with the children.

"Endeavour came up to me at the end of the exercise and told me that I changed." Shouto could not stop the raw fury that knotted his gut as he thought of it, because if not for Izuku knocking sense into him at the Sports Festival, Shouto would have remained closed off and emotionally stunted in his hatred for Endeavour, without ever having the wonderful friends and boyfriend who he cherished now.

"He said he was proud of me and wanted to become a hero that I could be proud of." Shouto did not know how Endeavour could say those words so casually after the hell he put Shouto and his family through in Endeavour's quest to surpass All Might. Did Endeavour forget what he did to Shouto's mother?

And amidst the anger narrowing his eyes and stiffening his jaw, Shouto voiced a desperate question. "Why does he want to act like a father now?"

Bowing his head, Shouto was surprised to see his own tears of frustration hitting his lap but before he could dwell on them, his boyfriend wrapped his arms around him, holding Shouto tight.  
"I'm sorry Shouto."

His boyfriend rubbed circles on his back, soothing his unsettled nerves with that gentle touch. "I think Endeavour saw what you became in spite of him."

"How do you mean?"

"Well," Izuku began. "Ever since the Sports Festival and moving into the dorms , you were able to grow as a person and a hero outside of his influence and he knows he can't take credit for any of it."

"Oh."

"Plus out of all your siblings, he hurt you the most, so he might be trying to make up for it by becoming a better hero for your sake."

Resting his head on Izuku's shoulder, Shouto considered Izuku's logic and despite its soundness, Shouto was uncertain about whether Endeavour could change or not, if people could change that easily but it was not long ago since Shouto believed he was only a tool created to surpass All Might. "I still have to think about what this means but Japan would benefit from having a stronger number one."

"That's right, take your time, Izuku said before adding. " And you know what?"

Pulling away, Shouto faced his boyfriend. "What?"

"I'm proud of you too." Izuku said with a playful jab to Shouto's chest, breaking the tension of the moment.

Shouto's lips twitched as he wrapped his arms around Izuku, vowing to later show Izuku how much Shouto loved and missed him. "Did I tell you what the children called my first aid kit?"

The End

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 **A/N:** Thank you for reading.


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